Gaming Addiction Help Article – Handling Gaming Addiction in Marriage UK, UAE and US
Addiction in any form tends to be something that really affects relationships not to mention can cause them to break down completely. But what is gaming addiction and why is it something that does damage to relationships?
If you thought that video gaming addiction signs was only reserved for teenagers with loads of spare time and no purpose in life, then think again. This problem is one that affects a lot of adults in relationships because the person who is addicted is usually obsessed with their activity at the expense of pretty much anything else which requires their attention.
Gamers tend to spend every minute of their spare time outside the office or household duties playing games or researching ways to conquer their current games or finding out about new games that will be hitting the shelves soon.
And with over 2 billion gamers in the world and a gaming industry making in excess of $138 billion in revenue, this is a problem that affects a lot more relationships than we think.
It’s an escape for many gamers, an escape from reality and having to face day to day issues and chores.
Screen and phone addiction has been increasing rapidly over the years, now it is used to fill up the gaps in between talking, waiting and to rid any feelings of boredom or loneliness. The difference with gaming is, rather than a quick social media or whats app message check, it sucks them for a long time and the games are of course designed to be highly addictive.
Relationships are made stronger by the meaningful time you spend together. This can be simply hanging out together or doing activities together that bring you closer to that person. Spending time in a relationship is crucial because it helps us maintain that bond we share and it makes both people feel valued and loved. If you have listened to my podcast for a while you will know I mention 10 hours minimum alone time a week to rebuild where ever possible. For the people who join my online couples counselling I get them to share how they can make those 10 hours together and report back.
In life, there are a lot of things that require our attention and time including work, family and any other commitments we make along the way. So while spending a lot of time with your partner may not be possible make sure you have quality time together, making the most of the time you spend with one another.
How Video Gaming Addiction Affects The Marriage – Gaming Addiction Help
When there is a partner in a relationship who is not into gaming quite like the other one (or is, but is not displaying signs of gaming addiction) it results in a deterioration of that relationship. Gamers will usually want to spend every single minute they can catching up on their gaming and this can and does eat into the meaningful time they would have otherwise spent with their partner.
This can leave their partners feeling:
It’s normal to wonder how much value you hold in your partner’s life when they want to spend more time playing games than spending even 30 minutes together and this is where it becomes a very big problem. Also having worked with many women or men to single handedly change this in their marriage or couples I hear many share that the mood swings that come with losing games can also be a problem, where the video gaming addict is unhappy unless they are winning and in order to win, they don’t want any noise at all. So for the non gaming addict they are scared to speak to their partner in fear of a angry reaction.
The non-gaming partner can start to resent their partner because they have time for gaming but not the relationship and this resentment can go both ways as the gaming addict wants space to do what they want in their free time. They feel like their partner is nagging them and always on their case about this particular topic. This may make them want to play games even more in rebellion as of course nobody likes to be told what to do.
And resentment kills passion and closeness and it can bring up other problems that may not have been a problem in the relationship previously. Like a way a couple speaks to each other. Or a battle over control. Often the gaming addict will feel like their partner is controlling them and dictate their life, they may also feel judged and criticized so criticize back and begin to act out and go out of their way to hurt their partner because they are feeling hurt.
Very soon, things that never got in the way of the relationship could take up all of your time and soon quality time together turns into arguing.
I have helped many individuals, couples and teenagers with gaming addiction treatment Dubai and online. Getting gaming addiction help is important if you are seeing the signs. Sadly gaming addiction is a real issue that needs to be addressed.
Another way I see gaming addiction causing problems in the marriage is where a husband or wife will say “I’ll only play when you are in bed asleep, so it doesn’t affect you.”
This is something often someone with an alcohol, shisha, smoking addiction problem will also say. It’s an illusion to think that because someone is doing something when the other is in bed they are not affected when your living together. Mainly because not sleeping together at the same time, ruins chances for intimacy and sex. Also because the gaming, alcohol or shisha addict will likely be tired, grumpy and less energised the next morning to do things. This can ruin weekends together and also lead to separate rooms. Contact me to find out more about gaming addiction help in UK and Dubai
This happened in my relationship, my partner was addicted to numbing out in front of the TV. He watched trashy reruns of old movies and tv until really late, smoking away until the early hours of the morning. I went to bed around 11.30pm and he would join me hours later. Then I would get up around 7 or 8am and he would need to sleep in for hours or if he did get up he would be moody and want to watch TV to get to a point where he wanted to talk. This led to separate beds in separate rooms and our closeness deteriorated we were more like friends, flat mates that lived in different worlds.
From my heart I ask you is it time to wake up? Is it time to seek gaming addiction treatment or perhaps online couples counseling support?
I say this because the very sad reality which also exists because of gaming addiction is regret. Often when people have recovered from their addictions, they express an intense amount of regret because they missed out on a lot of things while being addicted to their gaming. Not spending time with family, kids or loved ones remains high up on the list of regrets along with losing a partner to divorce or a break up as a result of the video gaming addiction.
And the problem in most cases is that by the time the person realises they have a problem, is usually when the other partner says it’s too late and there is no way of making up for the time that was lost.
Being addicted to gaming removes people from living in the real world with meaningful interaction and healthy relationships and instead traps the person in virtual reality.
There comes a time in this kind of relationship where the partner on the end of constant let down can no longer take it and there is generally two ways that things can go, depending on how serious the relationship is:
Either the partner decides it’s not worth living a life this way and leaves or they decide to invest in an attempt to help the person stop their gaming addiction and together they turn around the marriage.
In the online gaming addiction treatment I run alone or as part of online couples counseling. I get the person to look at what the benefits it gives them and support them to find healthy alternatives. I also focus on communication, connection and happiness.
If you are open to consider gaming addiction help and online couples counseling do feel free to book a call with me online to discuss further addiction treatment.