When a person always insists on having their own way, making all the decisions, not allowing the other to have an opinion or to speak their mind, threatening rejection or even threatening physical violence if the other person does not comply with their wishes. To deprive another of their autonomy.
Berating, belittling, criticizing, name calling, screaming and yelling, threatening, blaming, and using sarcasm and humiliation against another person. The use of the silent treatment is also abusive. Verbal abuse causes emotional wounds that are extremely difficult to heal.
Placing unreasonable demands on another person like expecting that they put aside everything to satisfy the demander. Expecting the other to put everything aside to satisfy one’s needs and demanding the other’s undivided attention as well as requiring the other to spend all their free time with the one. Demanding the other submit to sex whenever one wants is abusive too. Not be satisfied no matter how much the other gives and criticizing any attempt the other make to please the person.
When a child is expected to something they are not ready to be ultimately meaning they sacrifice their right to a childhood. This can happen when a child is asked to play their parents’ marriage counselor, or is put in the middle of the marriage and made to take sides.
Ignoring the basic physical, psychological, social, health and educational needs of the child.
Either consciously or unconsciously coercing another into doing what one wants by playing on their fear, guilt, or compassion. This is known as one of the most powerful ways of manipulating another person and is used when one threatens to end the relationship if the other does not do what one wants, or when one rejects the other or distances oneself until the other gives in to one’s demands.
Exercising drastic mood swings, sudden emotional outbursts for no apparent reason, or inconsistent responses. Alcoholics, drug addicts or caffeine addicts are extremely unpredictable, exhibiting one personality when sober and a totally different one when intoxicated or high. This forces the people around them to always be on edge never knowing what to expect.
To be unrelentingly critical, always finding fault and never being pleased. This eats away at the other’s self-confidence and sense of self-worth and undermines any good feelings they have about themselves and their accomplishments or achievements. Eventually the other will be convinced that nothing they do is worthwhile, and they may feel like just giving up.
To humiliate, criticise, or make fun of another in front of others, discounting their achievements and always blowing their mistakes out of proportion all in an attempt to discredit them or make them look bad in the eyes of others.
Gaslighting/ Mental Torture/ Crazy-making
When one deliberately and continually denies that certain events occurred or denies that the other said something when they did not, or when one insinuates that the other is exaggerating or lying when one knows they are not, this is a very malicious and dangerous game.
When one constantly causes upheaval and discord, when arguments are deliberately started
and one is in continual conflict. One may be addicted to drama, having grown up in a dysfunctional, highly chaotic, or alcoholic family where there were frequent arguments, physical abuse or other forms of disruption or upset.
Any physical show of force for the purpose of intimidating, threatening , or controlling another person is physical abuse. Includes: Slapping, hitting, punching, shaking, kicking, pushing, tripping, burning, biting, pinching, whipping or hair pulling.
Throwing objects at the person or using an object to hit with, or burn with. To bang the other’s head against something, to hold down, force another to sit or lie in a certain position, or force the other’s arms behind their back.
Includes shaming or moralizing in the name of God or the religion. Can be a means of forcing someone to do what they know is not right for them to do, with the fear of going to hell or being unloved by God.
Unwelcome sexual advances or physical or verbal conduct of a sexual nature.
Physically forcing another to have sex against their will. Marital and Date Rape are applicable here, too. When another says No to sex, and they are forced anyway, this is rape.
Sexual activity of any nature, energetic or otherwise, with a member of the same family.
Pressuring another into engaging in sexual acts that they find distasteful or repulsive.
Pressuring another against their volition to view pornographic movies, look at porn magazines, or read porn literature. Leaving porn movies, magazines or literature easily accessible to young children.
Pressuring another into kinky sex, such as group sex, sadomasochism, fantasy rape, bondage, bestiality, urolagnia (urinating on the other or being urinated on) or any other fetish against one’s will.
You will leave this powerful 20-minute session with:
4 Steps to Heal Your Past and Let Love In. Includes counseling, healing, coaching and hypnotherapy for a transforming day.
1-on-1 coaching in packages of 8, 12 or 16 sessions tailored for your specific needs, including counseling, coaching and hypnotherapy.
Including 12 audios and workbooks, personal journal. 5 meditations and hypnosis recordings, personal contact with me and membership site access.
Option to do the course with or without group coaching
Nicola Beer helps men and women to heal from abuse, to process repressed memories that come back and helps you to heal past hurt.
Services include marriage coaching an alternative to marriage counselling in Dubai, Abu Dhabi and Online, divorce counseling, grief counselling, anger management, eating disorder treatment. Eating support includes helping men and women to have freedom from bulimia symptoms, anorexia nervosa, compulsive eating, comfort eating, binge eating disorder and emotional eating.
She also runs a relationship coaching certification training and helps life coaches to launch their business. She is a UK certified grief recovery specialist, counselor, life coach and hypnotherapist online or UAE & Saudi Arabia (Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Doha, Bahrain, muscat. Riyadh, Jeddah Khobar, Damman)
© 2018 Nicola Beer All Rights Reserved.